SCAWWY 😱 rondo

[concoctive]

In the tapestry of floriography, the borage flower stands out as a symbol of emotional fortitude and joy. Its star-shaped blue blossoms have carried the weight of courage since Roman times, believed to embolden warriors on the battlefield. Borage flower and leaves are used for fever, cough, and depression.

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[concoctive]

[ as far as alfyn is concerned, sazantos can go suck an egg and take a hike. ]

I know - gods, I know. [ his own breath hitches, and he's been crying, too - thinking of how kind both iwatooshi and aerith had been to him, on the plans that he and aerith had been making for their departed. on the way that iwatooshi always told him his views of life were good. thinks of cloud, serious but protective, how he'd wanted to get to know him more - and how he'd saved him, just this tuesday.

and he thinks that the flameguard should be allowed to grieve his friends just like everybody else. so all he does is knock his head into rondo's, curling them together and squeezing him to let him shake, let him cry. ]

[flameguard]

[ be nice to him

anyway no it's. it's terrible. he feels alfyn hitch against him and swallows, hard, eventually just turning his face up to the heavens and staring at them. it's moments like these that he almost desperately wishes he could have some guidance, but there's - there's no one to guide him, anymore. not really. who would he go to on nights like these, before? to iwatooshi. to aerith.

he swallows, hard. ] ...It'll.. it'll be okay. [ even though it doesn't feel like it. he has to try and reach for the light for the both of them. ]

[concoctive]

But it doesn't have to be right now, Rondo.

[ how many nights has he cried in this place? some would maybe marvel at the fact he has any more tears to cry at all, let alone that he hasn't broken down. a place like scawwy, and the shifting locations, they aren't really meant for people like them. but he holds onto it the same as he holds onto rondo, now, taking a big, shuddery breath before he pulls back enough to rub his right eye with his fist. ]

... you've let me lean on you more than once, since we got here. You can lean on me, too , y'know - just 'cause you're the Flameguard doesn't mean that you're not allowed to grieve like everybody else.

That you're not okay... it just means that you care. It means you're good.

[flameguard]

[ right now, it doesn't feel good to be good. it doesn't feel like much of anything except lost. the punches keep coming, and rondo's good at handling them - he's really good at handling this kind of thing, really good at always seeing the silver lining, but this week hit hard.

he pulls back when alfyn does, rubbing his eyes. ]

... I know. [ quietly. ] Thank you. [ and it is genuine, as it so often is. ]

I... I am afraid that someone might have gone after Sir Iwatooshi because they thought he attacked Sir Ichiban, last week.

[concoctive]

But he... [ alfyn frowns deeply, moving to more carefully brush the tears from his left eye so he doesn't agitate the healing wound. it gives him a moment to try and compose himself, as something fists in his throat, hot and miserable. ]

There wasn't really anythin', I thought, that would point towards that. Some weird injuries, but he'd got those investigatin'... [ their SWORD. he looks soulfully at rondo. ] He wasn't actin' any different, last week, and this week either. He was... he was still the same...

[flameguard]

...I know. I didn't think it was him, either. Anyone could have worn such a large cloak.

[ the size just wouldn't matter. he swallows down a lump in his own throat, and drops his hands to curl in his lap. ]

I... like to think that it was just three monsters, and not that someone acted without a full story. At least... at least I hope that is the case.

[concoctive]

[ he thinks of therion, his deft fingers curled into purple cloth and pulling it up to hide his face. how the size of that thing could fit alfyn comfortably but drowns the smaller frame.

yeah. anyone could've worn it and it wouldn't have mattered. ]

We'll have to ask again. [ he hates this. ] But I want to hope, too. Erin said it was the monster, like it was with Mr. Boothill, and not the - that rotten basement. It's awful to hope that people are gettin' controlled like that, but it's better than the other choices.

[flameguard]

... yes.

[ the other choices make his heart sink in his chest like a stone. too similar to the rings. too similar to the knife's edge of what pushed sazantos over. human desire is filthy. and that entire room is just a room of promises that can be made but will likely not be kept, a temptation set behind a glass cabinet.

he takes a deep breath. ]

But that is something we must be prepared for, as well. I... find the act of killing someone for one of those objects far more evil than the will of someone being stolen by a monster they have no control over. But it is the latter that we must be vigilant for.

[concoctive]

[ it reminds him of the headmaster. lyblac. mattias. their desire that brought suffering upon others, like so many others before them, and so many that will come after them. ]

You're right. Most people here... I don't think they would succumb to somethin' like the temptation of the things there. Even if it could solve all our problems, it's not worth somebody else's life. But the cult. [ their companions, the people that have become their friends, being used to kill like puppets. ]

If we won't do it, they'll make us. We have to find a way to break through all of this.