[ moving to drop down next to her, graceless and stiff from tension and healing, alfyn settles crisscross and stares into the water. ]

... never gonna get easier. At least, not for me - and I'll ask one of you to knock me upside the head if it does. I don't... [ no matter how many people die, or what happens, he never, ever wants to get used to them having to kill their companions and friends. ] Used to fightin', used to survivin', all that comes with livin' in a place with wars and illness galore.

But I don't wanna get used to this.